Prayer to the “Job Creator” by William Manson

Oh beneficent Job-Creator, omnipotent yet merciful, we humbly solicit your aid in this time of need.  Thou hast, in thy unfathomable Wisdom, taken away our livelihoods, sending forth a Plague of outsourcing, automation and credit default swaps.  We have meekly borne thy punishments, and have humbly awaited our redemption and deliverance.  Yet the Bureau of Labor Statistics hath borne false witness to a grievous Truth: thou hast turned away from us in our most ominous time of need.